Red Wine

i have created not 1, but 3 other blog sites and during each endeavor been thwarted even before reaching the final moment to post thoughts. but the mishaps have all been good...usually, the presence of my son, jack, wanting to snuggle or snack. there was a time when i'd journal. my favorite part of doing so was in all the afters. just after i wrote, i'd feel the relief of laying down troubles or the rest of knowing a certain memory would now not be lost. and long after i wrote, i'd reread and remember a time so perfectly. i always have a problem with the before. i can anticipate the thing so much that i end up not doing it ...the actuality somehow less than the possibility i dreampt up. but this forum seems easier somehow. my piano teacher used to tell me that pianists could be fast typist. i suppose you train a man to run on a track and the woods will not be hard for him to master. she was right. i like to type. without the presence of my piano, it is music. though certainly of a different type.
i am 30 years old... and i love my family...i love reading...i like sappy movies which make me cry and i love to squish my feet in clay. and though i don't drink alcohol very often, not out of any objection, the frank fullness of red wine in the evenings allows me to write. when i am tired, it doesn't make me untired, but it does make me rest in the awakeness...which means i can actually focus on 1 thing!
i look forward to this and to unfolding the unfoldable bits of our lives into this "blog",,,this journal of sorts. if only for the writer, i am glad....she finds must respite.